Shane Pauker
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April 25, 2026
SEATTLE — The World Health Organization formally recommended people only consume a disappointingly low number of beers at lunch, citing…
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Kevin Coutu
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April 24, 2026
NEW YORK — Local therapist Dr. Lauren Mitchell reassured her patient Monday that it is completely normal for a loser…
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Tim Graham
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April 23, 2026
HANSON, Mass. — Local bigoted alcoholic Bud Cullen will likely live longer than many members of his family, according to…
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Ben Sobieck
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April 23, 2026
COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. — A local child developed a new kind of “little” diabetes after eating only Little Debbie snack cakes,…
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Kevin Coutu
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April 22, 2026
NEW YORK — NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell revealed that the organization is unveiling a new policy to address the domestic…
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Casey Smith
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April 21, 2026
WASHINGTON — Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced that he has patented denim condoms, confirmed…
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Cam Berkowitz
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April 21, 2026
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — A new study from California State University, Bakersfield found that aggressively and methodically punching the air within…
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Bob Kerr
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April 20, 2026
RICHMOND, Va. — Tobacco giant Marlboro, in a bid to capitalize on the sober-curious movement, is introducing a line of…
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Jesse Kubanet
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April 19, 2026
LEHI, Utah — Trove Brands, the exclusive drinkware brand behind Owala, announced a new bottle designed specifically for parents to…
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Nick Brandt
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April 18, 2026
AUSTIN, Texas — Tesla Inc. is reportedly manufacturing their vehicles to drive intentionally in motorists’ field-of-view blind spots, confirmed frustrated…
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